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SubscriptionsSites I Read
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| the words out of my mouth may as well be chinese to you( perhaps instead of try anymore, i'll move to china)it's the only sensible thing to do; (i just read the poem i wrote in february, and how terribly scathing it was.) i wish i was more in touch with my emotions; lately, i've been feeling uncomfortable in my own skin and i'm not quite sure why. perhaps when i get to china, i'll buy a new one of those, too. | | |
| i am not dead,
only a whisper
lean in closely
so you can hear my existence
lean in closely,
so that i may shout
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| the past few days, i have been the biggest bitch just to save your life, and i'm sorry
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| my parents stole about 2700 dollars from me and i'm the bad guy.
so i played my guitar, hoping that the noise would scare away the creeping bitterness that nibbles at my ankles and touches my toes with hot, angry fingers because eventually it'll pull itself to my knees, then my thighs and up and up and up slowly eating me alive from the inside then it'll spew out of my mouth and eyes and ears and my asshole and my cunt like i have some fucked up form of e bola where i'm hemorrhaging negativity and hate instead of blood;
fuck;
thank god for apathy
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| i was scared and wanted to be comforted, instead i got harsh words.
sometimes i feel like you think i'm just a child. but if being a child means wanting a listening ear and kind words, then i'll never grow up to your standards. ever.
...after being cast aside ultimately
i realized you never knew me enough to hold on tightly enough
to keep me from sinking downward into the floor
into the earth
into the deepest
deepest
annals of inner space; & you are no longer the hurricane of butterflies that i needed;
& i miss the velvety storm, candy stormclouds
(amidst the wet i screamed she's doing this because she loves me, she does this because she loves me she does this --)
& i miss the gentle tongue fuckings caressing my ears and my lips lips oh god my lips against your lips
but in the sharp, pointed silence,
"who are you and where have you hidden all the sympathy?";
& i am frantically searching for a heartbeat inside of a brick wall
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